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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26690443">1994</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/evaneddie/pseuds/evaneddie'>evaneddie</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>dhylen writes one shots [63]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Julie and The Phantoms (TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Anxiety, Gen, TW: Implied Homophobia, found family/friendship</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 04:21:24</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,213</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26690443</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/evaneddie/pseuds/evaneddie</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>alex is down about missing his sister, and the band is there for him, supporting and loving him.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>dhylen writes one shots [63]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1433956</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>140</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1994</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>i haven't written anything in so long because of health issues so i hope this isn't too terrible and rusty. lemme know what you think :)<br/>follow me on tumblr @ghostlyyalex</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>They think that he can't hear them over his discordant drumming, that he can't hear their words of sympathy. Even if he couldn't, they don't hide their faces very well.</p><p><br/>
His chest feels so tight, like he's being swaddled in a much-too-firm blanket. He hears Julie ask Luke if their drummer is okay, and sees the slump in their shoulders when she gets the reply.</p><p><br/>
"It's his sister, Sarah. He saw her this morning, and it just brought back a lot of memories."</p><p><br/>
Alex catches Luke's eyes across the studio, and shoots him a sad frown. He can't be here right now, he has to leave.</p><p><br/>
If he's learnt anything as a ghost, it's that even though he's dead, he still feels like he's alive in some ways. Anxiety still floods his body often, much like when he was alive, causing his hands to occupy themselves with twiddling together or ruffling his hair. <br/>
Abandoning his drum set, Alex stands from his seat and wills his not-body away from here. In his hands, he holds his drum sticks, flicking them around and lightly tapping them in the air as if he were drumming for real. Even when he stands in the middle of the street outside Julie's house.</p><p>At least, he knows, here Julie won't come after him, won't risk being seen in the middle of the road talking to herself. But the guys, they could show up at any second. As much as he loves them, he doesn't know if he can deal with their pity right now.</p><p>"Alex, wait up," Luke calls after him. From a distance he can see his two longest friends heading towards him. Without a second thought, Alex poofs himself away once more.</p><p>He hadn't even been thinking if a destination, but it doesn't come as much of a shock to him when he realises where he stands solemnly. </p><p>Outside his younger - but now older than him - sister's house. It's probably deemed creepy to be watching from afar, even in the ghost realm. But it doesn't matter to him right now.</p>
<hr/><p>
  <em> <strong>August 23, 1994</strong> </em>
</p><p>
  <em>Alex can't stop the tears from rolling down his cheeks as he sits haphazardly at the top of the staircase, not even when he feels the small hand of his twelve year old sister touching his shoulder. </em>
</p><p><em>His dad is yelling obscenities throughout the house, verbally expressing that he wishes Alex was never born and that he refuses to accept the fact he has a son</em>. <em>His mother is there too, crying profusely over something she has no reason to be so upset over.</em></p><p>
  <em>"Why are they mad at you?" Sarah asks, her voice small and scared, worried about what's unfolding below them.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I told them I like boys, Sar," Alex replies, not expecting her to fully understand. "I'm gay, and now they hate me."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Squeezing past her older brother, Sarah moves down to the step in front of him, and sits carefully on the edge. "I don't think they hate you."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>Smiling wetly, grateful for how kind she's being, he takes a deep, shuddering breath. Before he can respond, he watches as his father moves closer to the bottom of the staircase, and with tears slipping out of his eyes, he tightens his grip on his hoodie clad biceps.</em>
</p><p><em>"Get out of my house, now! I want you out of my sight," growls the older man</em>. <em>Before all of this, Alex looked up to his father, someone he though of as a caring man who would do anything to protect his family. They had done so much together, and now it had all gone to hell in a hand basket.</em></p><p>
  <em>As a boy, Alex had wanted nothing more than to be like his dad. The two of them share many similar facial features; their jaw, same nose, matching eyes even. The one thing Alex got from his mother was her blonde hair. Now, he wishes to rid himself of all of this. Wishes that things could be different.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>In a second, Alex jumps from the ground, and bounds towards his bedroom, reaching for a duffel bag. </em>
</p><p><em>Sarah is on his heels, crying now too</em>.<em> "Please don't go, Alex. They just need time to cool down."</em></p><p>
  <em>Holding back a wretched sob, he kneels down to her height, grabbing her arms firmly in his hands. "They're never going to accept me, and they don't want me. I don't think they will want me talking to you, either."</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"But I accept you, isn't that enough?" Sarah's eyes are red and puffy, her irises swimming with fear of the unknown of what's to come. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>"It is, it means everything to me that you do. I promise to try and find a way of staying in contact with you." Softly, he kisses her forehead, crying gently as he looks her in the eyes one last time before getting up and beginning to pack his belongings.</em>
</p><p>
  <em>"I'll help," his sister says tearfully. "Gotta make you you have all the important stuff."</em>
</p>
<hr/><p>He never did find a way to keep in touch with his sister, other than sending her letters which he's almost one hundred percent certain their parents threw out on receival.</p><p>Now, she's so grown up, her blonde hair cut to a bob just above her shoulders, her eyes still so big and round now enhanced behind gold wire rimmed glasses, and a wide smile etched into her face. Even from where he stands, he can see grey hairs starting to poke through the light blonde, almost looking like highlights. It's still so weird that he's seventeen, and his baby sister has surpassed him to the ripe old age of thirty-eight. </p><p>A man stands beside her, his arm wrapped around her waist, his dark hair and skin reminding Alex of Julie. He assumes it's Sarah's husband, and what appears to be their late teenaged child sitting in front of a birthday cake with lit up candles.</p><p>"Happy Birthday, Alexis!" he can hear the older two shout, muffled from the walls and closed windows.</p><p>Alexis? She named her daughter after Alex?</p><p>The moment he's about to lose all composure, he hears his name called out from behind him. Whipping his head around, he sees Luke and Reggie standing together.</p><p>He wants to disappear, to just run away, but he knows right now he needs his friends more than ever. No second thought crosses his mind when he decides to jog towards them, already crying. Feeling their arms around him makes him feel ever so slightly less anxious than before. </p><p>"She named her daughter Alexis," Alex manages between gasps of sobs.</p><p>Luke and Reggie don't say anything as the hug their friend, they just hold him for as long as he needs. Until he's ready to leave.</p><p>When they poof back to Julie's studio, Alex starts talking straight away, apologising for leaving the way he did, and for acting like a downer.</p><p>"Don't you dare apologise to me," Julie replies the second she can get a word in, standing from her spot on the couch, and moving to hug Alex. Because that's something they can do now.</p><p>"She named her daughter Alexis," Alex repeats for the second time.</p><p>"That is beautiful," Julie says, smiling sadly at Luke over Alex's shoulder.</p>
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